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das_sporking2: (Das Sporking)

The Sporkings of Das Mervin and Company

We Suffer Through It So You Don't Have To!

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Created on 2017-04-05 14:24:32 (#2864151), last updated 2019-03-24 (2 days ago)

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Name:We Suffer Through It So You Don't Have To!
Location:Connecticut, United States of America
Posting Access:Select Members, Moderated

The original Das Sporking was a place where [personal profile] das_mervin could showcase her sporkings separate from her personal LiveJournal. As she put it, "However, as interest in the comm grew and my own real life schedule grew more hectic, I opened it up to other sporkers. And so, my comm became a tiny watering hole for sporkers who don’t just want to riff on a badfic—it’s for people who want to analyze it, too."

And that's probably the way it would have stayed until the death of LiveJournal...if not for SUP, the Russian company that owns LJ. They decided, in their infinite foolishness, to create terms of service that were a) only available in Russian (an English translation was available but was not binding); b) gave exclusive rights to SUP to use customers' writing without permission or compensation; c) mandated that every single post be rated if it was acceptable for children or not, according to Russian law, while not telling us what WAS acceptable for minors under Russian law; and d) stated that all customers must comply with Russian law. This, people quickly realized, meant that LGBTQ people could not speak about their experiences, as Russian law states that even telling minors that homosexuality is acceptable is illegal.

And yes, Russia does prosecute and heavily fine bloggers for violations of the anti-LGBTQ law.

The response of the mods was, "Oh HELL no!"

And so we came over here to Dreamwidth to start (hopefully) all over again.



1) The first rule of this sporking comm is the same first rule of any sporking comm, and I’m going to make sure it’s in big letters so everyone gets the point.


If the people in question find this on their own by accident, okay. But do NOT facilitate accidents. Do NOT link it to the people being sporked. It’s bad form, it's rude, it's cruel, and it's asking for trouble. It gives the mods grief, because then we have to deal with them coming over here and complaining, sending their legions of fans, or stalking and/or sending death threats to sporkers. Yes, this has happened--more than once. We'd rather that it didn't. We're funny that way.

So no trolling. None.

2) Generally, we have a three-ban policy here.

The first ban is, as a rule, temporary and relatively brief.

The second is longer--a month is typical.

The third ban is permanent.

WE DO NOT BAN MEMBERS LIGHTLY. For the record, here are crimes that will get you banned:

a) Harassing other comm members in comments, emails, private messages, etc. We will deal with this on a case-by-case basis, but we feel that the safety of our members is paramount. While we realize that much of the internet tolerates toxic/racist/sexist/etc. behavior, we do not.

b) Instigating third parties to harass, threaten, etc. other comm members in comments, emails, private messages, etc. See above.

c) Trolling writers featured here (see Rule #1). This will get you an instant permanent ban. We won't even waste our time with the first two. Troll a sporked writer, and you're out of here.

This list is not all-inclusive, but it should give you some idea of what is unacceptable. We'll add more as we need to, though.

By the way, you're only in trouble if a mod tells you, "This is a warning." A mod telling you, "Hey, you need to fix your formatting" has no effect on your record.

3) BE POLITE. Treat other members with respect, and please don’t bring up politics, religion, lifestyles, etc., and start making inflammatory comments about them. This is not a place for political debate, flame wars, etc.

If you absolutely must talk any sensitive subjects, first of all, make sure that they are on-topic. Don’t just bring them up out of nowhere. And secondly, stay civil. Don’t declare anything BAD BAD BAD and start yelling at other people because they don’t share your opinion. We're all for calm and rational discussions where points are made and people converse reasonably, but the minute arguing starts, we mods will shut it down. Why the hell would you even come here to talk politics, anyway? [community profile] das_sporking2 is for bad writing and snark.

4) AVOID EXCESSIVE TRASHING OF THE WRITERS FEATURED HERE. Yes, we know, you can get mad at a writer for shredding a canon you love with their fic. But there is a limit, and you need to know not to cross a line. You can angrily shake your fist and call the occasional name, but when you start threatening people with vivisection in the comments, we're going to have to tell you to stop. (Unless it’s Neil. In that case, vivisection is way, way too light—step it up, people.)

5) DON'T FEED TROLLS. We're not talking about writers coming over here and getting into fights—we're talking about trolls. You know what they are—people who come here to deliberately start fights or rile everyone. If you see a troll in a post, alert a mod immediately and one of us will put a stop to it. Don’t try to fight with them, because the second you reply? They win. Because that’s what they wanted. It doesn’t matter what your reply might be, either—they just want a reply.



This is not just a warning for some of the fics featured here. Yes, there are some fics featured here that are extremely NSFW, like the "Hogwarts Exposed” tetralogy, "alien companion," and "Harry Potter and the Head of Black." Fics like that often have rape, sex, and particularly disgusting fetishes all over them. Just keep an eye on the tags used and you’ll know what you might find under the cut. However, we are also going to warn you that the sporkers sometimes get stressed and start screaming obscenities, and most sporkers are fond of some well-placed innuendo, whether it be subtle or not-so-subtle. Sporkers also like to use pictures and macros, so it’s always wise to look out for those.

So, basically, the warning is that we’re all adults here, and we act like it, and sometimes, the fics aren’t all sterile sweetness and light like the Ariana Black series. It’s safe to say that the sporking is rated what the fic is.

As for spoilers, we know that some people loathe and detest spoilers while others eat spoilers for breakfast. We do try to warn for spoilers in the sporkings AND in the cut text messages. However, if a fic is part of an ongoing series, there may be discrepancies between what you know and what was available when the author wrote the fic. There is no point in lambasting a fic for not complying with, say, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows if the last book available when the fic was written was Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.



Every entry on this journal is well-tagged. The tag list is very thorough; you can search through it by spork type, fic type, fandom, fic title, series' title (if any), sporkers, trigger warnings, and more.

If you are looking for the two best known sporkings for this comm--the Twilight series and the Fifty Shades series--look under "sm [TITLE]" and "elj [TITLE]." Using the initials of Stephenie Meyer and E.L. James makes the title tags somewhat easier to find.

Sporkers do warn for things like racism, ableism, sexism, anti-Semitism, homophobia, transphobia, violence, child abuse, abuse (physical), abuse (emotional), abuse (sexual), etc. in the texts of the fics, books, essays, etc. being sporked. It should go without saying that we expect the sporkers to avoid such things in the sporks themselves, but in case anyone was wondering if such comments are permitted under the comm rules in the name of humor--no, they're not.



To celebrate our arrival here on Dreamwidth, we're opening sporker sign-ups again!

Before you sign up, however, we want you to consider very carefully if you're going to be able to maintain a spork to the end. Depression, illness, stress, school, work, unexpected catastrophes, etc., can all get in the way of extended sporks. It's also not unusual for sporks to last much longer than you might anticipate. (For example, Gehayi and Ket Makura agreed to spork the Fifty Shades series, thinking it would take about six months. The sporking of all three books, including outtakes, lasted for over four years.)

We suggest, therefore, that new sporkers start by sporking one-shot stories rather than chaptered fics or a series of books. It'll be easier, and it will give you time to develop your own voice as a sporker.
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